


We Breathe in the Air of This Small Town

by GracefulVengeance



Category: Professional Wrestling, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Blood and Violence, Falling In Love, First Meetings, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Teen Angst, Teen Romance, Teenage Rebellion, Underage Drinking, Young Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2019-03-22
Packaged: 2019-05-01 07:00:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14514972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GracefulVengeance/pseuds/GracefulVengeance
Summary: Seth meets lone drifter Dean on his walk home from school. What would've just been a strange one-time encounter with a young runaway blooms into a quick friendship when they find out they share a passion for wrestling. But the closer Seth and Dean get, the more unstable things start to become.





	1. Roadside

Small town, small minds. Seth always knew he was destined for bigger things. He craved excitement, thrills, a sense of purpose. It was something he didn’t see himself finding in Davenport, Iowa of all places. That is, until he met the boy in the worn denim jacket. The last thing Seth expected to find on his walk home from school was a stranger. He knew just about everyone in town, so when he saw a boy around his age on the side of the road, sticking his thumb out and promptly flipping off cars as they passed by, he was taken aback.

 

“Hey kid, you know any good places to eat around here?” He asked.

 

Seth wrinkled his nose in a sneer. Kid? They looked around the same age. He considered just ignoring him and continue walking, but something made him stop and answer.

 

“First of all, I’m not a kid. Secondly, there’s a diner downtown. Just your run of the mill food you’d find at most, but it isn’t bad.”

 

The boy smirked and huffed in amusement. “Mind showing me where it is? I’m new around here.”

 

“Sure, I guess,” Seth replied. “I’m Seth, by the way.”

 

“Dean,” he said as he shuffled next to Seth.

 

“So… where are you from? Since you’re new here and all.”

 

“Around,” was his answer.

 

Seth took a quick glance at Dean as they walked. He carried a backpack that had seen better days, the rest of his clothes matched his faded jacket and looked like they hadn’t been washed in a while. He didn’t say anything about them. The rest of the walk was met with silence.

 

“Alright, here we are,” Seth gestured to the restaurant.

 

“Thanks,” Dean replied, making his way to the door without so much as a second glance.

 

“See you around I guess?” Seth asked.

 

“Not likely.”

 

Seth huffed and shook his head, turning on his heel and making his way home. “What a jerk.”

 

* * *

 

A couple days had passed since Seth had met the aloof Dean, and Seth really wondered if he was just some sort of drifter wandering through his town. Not that he cared really, it was just curiosity. People like that didn’t typically pass through here. Just as he was contemplating where Dean might’ve headed, he saw him standing by the side of the road yet again, but this time it looked like he was waiting for something. They made eye contact and Dean motioned for Seth to come to him. Seth furrowed his brow, but walked across the street to meet him.

 

“I thought you said I _wouldn’t_ be seeing you around.” Seth said, feeling the corners of his mouth curve into a snarky smile.

 

“Don’t you want to know why I stuck around to wait for you?” Dean replied.

 

“You stuck around for me?” Seth sounded surprised.

 

“Don’t make anything of it. I saw you and your buddies setting up a wrestling ring the other day.”

 

“Were you spying on me?” Seth admittedly, was more intrigued than weirded out.

 

“I was just taking a walk through the neighborhood and happened to see you guys that’s all,” Dean swung his backpack off his shoulder and set it on the ground.

 

He knelt down and unzipped it. Inside, among rumpled up clothes, were some tattered magazines. He pulled one out to reveal that it was a magazine on wrestling. Seth’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. He knelt down with Dean and brushed his fingers over the front cover.

 

“I’ve been watching wrestling since I was a kid. Started picking up tapes and mags on it not too long after that,” Dean mused as he thumbed through the pages.

 

“I’ve been into it since I was young too. I kind of just jumped right into practicing when my parents finally let me.”

 

“They just let you put on backyard shows like that?”

 

Seth nodded. “Once I turn eighteen I’m going to start training, I’ve made up my mind.”

 

“Yeah? Me too, man. How old are you now?”

 

“Sixteen. I’m counting down the days. What about you?” Seth sat down on the grass, Dean followed suit.

 

“I’m seventeen.”

 

“Lucky. You’re closer than I am,” Seth paused. “I don’t mean to pry, but where did you live before coming here?”

 

“Cincinnati,” Dean replied.

 

“Wow, that’s far. What brings you to Iowa?”

 

Dean’s expression darkened and he stayed silent. Seth chewed his lip nervously.

 

“I’m sorry, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” He stuttered.

 

“Some other time maybe,” Dean said.

 

“So… there’s a park not too far from here. You wanna go there so we can look at your magazines?” Seth asked, hopeful and excited.

 

“Sounds like _you_ really want to,” Dean teased. “Lead the way.”

 

* * *

 

They spent what felt like hours reading and talking about their favorite wrestlers, their favorite moves, and everything in between. They sat on the swings in that park until dusk settled over the town and the crickets started singing their songs. Seth shot up in a panic and checked his phone.

 

“Shit! My parents are gonna kill me if I’m late for dinner,” he exclaimed.

 

Dean looked disappointed. “Oh, yeah. I guess it is getting kind of late. Wanna do this again sometime?”

 

“Yeah definitely! How about Friday after school? I can stay out longer since it’s the weekend.”

 

“Sure, works for me,” Dean kept his seat on the swing. “See you then.”

 

“See you, Dean!” Seth cracked a smile and waved.

 

Dean sighed as the swing creaked under his weight. He pulled out a cigarette and lit it, letting the smoke wisp around him. He kicked at the dirt and ashes beneath his feet, hoping it didn’t get too cold tonight.


	2. Meet the Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New feelings start to bloom when Seth invites Dean over to his house, but Dean isn't ready to completely trust Seth yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writer's block is killer.

The frigid air was relentless today. The weather had been pretty weird lately, but it seemed like winter was finally catching up. Seth clenched his teeth, wrapping his arms around himself as he made his way to the park. Dean was waiting on the swing, looking just as miserable as Seth. He was shivering, even in his winter clothes, and the tip of his nose was bright red. Seth couldn’t help but smile.

 

“Hey Rudolph, need some help pulling Santa’s sleigh?”

 

“A Christmas joke? Really dude? Totally lame,” Dean was smiling still.

 

“It  _ is _ December, totally warranted,” Seth replied with a snicker.

 

Dean snorted and shook his head, he started to pull out the books when Seth stopped him.

 

“Hey, you wanna just do this at my house?” Seth rubbed the back of his neck. “All jokes aside, it’s fucking freezing out here.”

 

Dean’s relief came out in a puff of white air and he stood up, stretching out his arms and swinging his backpack over his shoulder. 

 

“Lead the way.”

 

* * *

 

“Mom, dad, I’m home,” Seth announced as they crossed the threshold. 

 

Dean felt a nervous tension in his shoulders that he couldn’t shake. They peeked into the living room, where Seth’s parents resided, the TV providing necessary background noise. Dean’s feet felt like lead balloons. 

 

“Mom, dad, this is my friend Dean. We’re just going to hang out in my room,” Seth gestured to Dean, who stood awkwardly with his hands stuffed in his pockets.

 

“Sir, ma’am, it’s nice to meet you,” Dean mumbled.

 

“No need to be so shy, dear,” Seth’s mom replied, a friendly smile on her face. “Is this a new friend from school? I don’t recall seeing him here before.”

 

Seth and Dean shared a look. “Uh, yeah I met him at school. He just transferred here.”

 

“Good to see you making new friends, son,” his dad chimed in from his chair.

 

“Well we’re going to go up to my room now,” Seth said as he lead Dean upstairs.

  
  


Seth’s room wasn’t entirely what Dean would’ve expected. On his walls were a mixture of wrestling and punk band posters. In one corner of the room sat his bed, a twin sized mattress with a black and red plaid comforter and matching sheets. A tall bookshelf stood against the opposite wall to his bed. On it sat wrestling action figures, various comic books, and random knick knacks. A scrapbook that read ‘Tickets and Memories’ in scrawling, but still legible handwriting lay on one of the shelves. An old black bean bag chair sat next to the bookcase and next to that, a door to what Dean assumed was a closet. A laundry basket filled with clothes, mostly black, sat on the floor by the foot of his bed. A small TV sat on a stand in front of his bed, and underneath the stand was some kind of gaming system, two controllers placed on top of it. Everything seemed to have its place. Dean smiled, feeling the previous awkwardness melt away.

 

“Make yourself at home,” Seth said, hanging his jacket on a little hook on the inside of his door.

 

Dean followed suit, hanging his jacket up and setting his backpack down on the floor. Seth flopped onto his bed with a sigh, spread eagle with his right arm and leg dangling off the edge. Dean walked over to the bookshelf to admire the wrestling paraphernalia. “What’s up with this scrapbook?” He asked, pointing to the tattered book.

 

Seth sprung up from his bed and grabbed the book, motioning for Dean to sit next to him. “I’ll show ya.”

 

He opened the book to reveal page upon page of tickets to different shows, pictures here and there. The book wasn’t even close to being full, but Seth really seemed proud of it. “I keep all my ticket stubs in here. Wrestling shows, concerts, everything. It’s fun to look back on these and reminisce.”

 

Seth had a sentimental glow around him, his eyes crinkling at the sides from smiling. Dean couldn’t help but admire how candid Seth was. Seth turned to the first page, thumbing over the ticket stub. “This was the first wrestling show I ever went to. My dad took me when I was like 5, but I still remember it so clearly.”

 

“It’s hard to forget your first show,” Dean said, starting to feel sentimental himself.

 

* * *

 

Hours passed while the two boys exchanged stories, talked about their favorite shows, and the experiences they’ve had. Seth was about to show Dean some games on his Xbox when his mom knocked on the door.

 

“Dinner’s ready if you boys are hungry,” his mom called from outside the door.

 

Dean’s stomach aggressively reminded him that he’d been saving what little money he had and rationing his food. The prospect of a hot, home-cooked meal made his mouth water. “Do you wanna stay for dinner?” Seth asked. “We could play games after...if you want.”

 

While Dean’s pride opposed, he couldn’t ignore his growling stomach. He nodded and waited for Seth’s queue and followed him downstairs. Much to Dean’s dismay, the table was set, and the idea of making idle conversation with Seth’s parents had him feeling anxious. He pulled out a chair next to Seth just as his parents set the food on the table. Dean fixed himself a conservative plate, despite his stomach’s protests.

 

“So Dean,” Dean stiffened, the table was silent while Seth’s mom spoke. Here we go. “Seth said you transferred here. Where did you come from?” At least this was an easy question to answer.

“I’m from Cincinnati,” he replied, trying pace himself as he ate. “Starving street rat” was not a persona he cared to put out in front of Seth’s parents. He felt like he was failing as he took the moment of silence as an opportunity to stuff his face again.

 

“That’s quite a ways. What brings you out here?” The question was innocent enough, but everytime he heard it it felt like picking at a scab. “Just needed a drastic change of scenery I guess,” was the best he could come up with. He wondered just how long he would be answering this same question. He could see Seth nervously chew on his lip in the corner of his eye. Luckily Seth’s mom left the conversation on that note.

 

“So Dean,” Seth’s dad chimed in after a moment of silence. “Seth tells me you like wrestling too.” Finally, something Dean could comfortably talk about. His eyes lit up and his whole body perked up, attuned to that one passion, wrestling. “Yes sir, I do, a lot.”

 

They spent the better part of dinner talking about their favorite moments, favorite wrestlers, and anything else they could think of. For the first time since he met Seth in this little town, Dean felt like things might turn out okay while he was here. However long, he hadn’t decided yet.

 

* * *

 

 

“You’re seriously telling me you’ve never played Xbox before?” Seth asked incredulously after winning yet another round.

 

Dean’s nose wrinkled in frustration, his hands gripping the controller. With a nod of determination he said, “One more game.”

  
  


Eventually Dean had given up on trying to beat Seth at any game he had and instead was watching him play some one player game. He glanced at the window, noticing it had gotten dark very quickly. His stomach lurched at the thought of figuring out a place to sleep. It was bound to get colder as winter dragged on. Seth noticed Dean’s silence and gave him a gentle nudge as they sat shoulder to shoulder against the foot of Seth’s bed.

 

“Hey, you alright?” Seth put down his controller and looked to see what Dean was transfixed on.

 

Seth’s shoulder brushing against his knocked him out of his thoughts. He reflexively leaned into Seth just slightly, nudging him back in a playful manner. Dean was stalling, he didn’t want to leave, but didn’t want to overstay his welcome either.

 

“I should go. It’s getting late,” Dean was already up and putting his jacket on before Seth could protest.

 

“Oh. I thought maybe you would wanna stay over,” Seth replied sheepishly, knowing it was probably a futile attempt.

 

Dean shook his head as he shouldered his backpack. He patted his pockets, making sure he wasn’t forgetting anything. “Let me at least walk you out,” Seth said.

 

Seth followed Dean to the door, opening it for him and stepping out onto the porch. “Tell your folks I said thanks again for dinner and everything,” Dean said. Seth nodded.

 

Dean held out his fist to bump it against Seth’s. He lingered for a moment there on Seth’s porch  before giving Seth a lopsided smile and a nod of his head. With that, he turned around and walked off. Seth stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame and watching Dean walk down his street, where off to he wasn’t sure. He thought back to Dean’s smile, the way his dusty blonde hair flopped over his forehead as he nodded, and felt his chest flutter. 

 


	3. A Holiday to Remember

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Events transpire that miraculously bring Seth and Dean closer together.

Seth and Dean had taken to hanging out a couple times a week. As December grew colder, Dean stayed longer. It wasn’t until a week before Christmas that Dean finally started opening up to Seth. Seth would remember that night forever, sitting on his roof, watching Dean talk quietly about his family and life in Cincinnati.

 

“I just figured it would be easier on my mom if I was gone for a little while,” Dean let the smoke leave his lips as he spoke, his eyes scanning the stars above them. 

 

“And your mom let you go? Just like that?”

 

Dean’s whole body seemed to shrink into itself. He took a long drag on his cigarette before speaking again. “I didn’t really give her a choice. I just packed some essentials, left a note, and walked out the door.”

 

“Doesn’t she worry?” Seth found himself scooting closer to Dean.

 

Dean pulled out an old flip phone. “I call her every once in a while to let her know I’m okay. She was furious at first. Demanded I come home, but after a while I think she realized this might be good for the both of us.”   
  


Dean was silent after that and had taken to staring up at the sky again. Seth wasn’t sure what to say. He felt an overwhelming urge to reach Dean in some way, to show him that he cared. He reached his hand out and placed it gently on Dean’s shoulder.

 

“I hope you find what you’re looking for, Dean,” Seth spoke softly.

 

Dean turned to Seth, their gazes locking for what seemed like an eternity, the background clouded with smoke from his almost burnt out cigarette. “Yeah, me too.”

 

He put out the cigarette butt on the back of his shoe and slipped it into the pocket of his jacket. “Let’s go back inside, it’s freezing.”

 

* * *

 

“So, do you plan on staying over tonight?” Seth cut right to the chase this time. “You’ve been over so much and it’s winter break so I know my parents wouldn’t mind.”

 

Dean sat on the corner of Seth’s bed, his backpack sitting at his feet. He looked out the window, it was starting to snow, making him pause with his initial answer.

 

“Where do you go at night? Your parents aren’t here. Do you even have a warm place to stay?”

“I manage,” he muttered. “Soon as I can find a job I’ll be way better off.”

 

Seth was surprised to hear this. He always thought Dean would up and leave once he felt like it. “You’re...you’re staying?”

 

“For the time being ye-” He was interrupted by Seth wrapping his arms around him. He froze for a moment, unsure how to respond to the sudden contact.

 

“I thought you would just leave one day and I would never see or hear from you again,” Seth mumbled into his jacket.

 

Dean returned the hug, wrapping his arms around Seth’s middle. “You don’t gotta worry about that, alright?”

 

They both let go and Seth quickly wiped a stray tear on his jacket. He saw Dean’s lips quiver before smiling at him. “Alright, I’ll stay tonight. Since it’s snowing and all.”

 

Seth’s eyes lit up and he grinned wide. “I’ll go tell my parents!”

 

* * *

 

 

They spent the better part of the evening playing games, talking, and rummaging through the pantry for junk food. Eventually they took to watching the snowfall over Seth’s street. It piled up faster than they both thought. Suddenly, the prospect of being able to enjoy the first real snowfall of winter got them both excited. Excited enough that when it was lights out, they were still talking, both of them shoulder-to-shoulder on Seth’s small bed.

 

“Dude, this bed is barely big enough for  _ you _ . How do you sleep on this?” 

 

Seth gave him a look. “The offer for me to sleep on the floor is still up. You  _ are  _ the guest.”

 

“Nuh uh,” Dean shook his head. “If either of us are too sore from sleeping on the floor to enjoy the snow tomorrow I’ll be pissed.”

 

“If we both sleep on our sides we should be fine,” Seth said through a yawn. “Speaking of, we should really get some sleep.”

 

Dean nodded and turned over, his back facing Seth. “G’night Seth,” he paused for a moment. “And uh, thanks...for y’know, letting me stay over and stuff.”

 

“No problem, man,” Seth smiled and playfully elbowed him in the back. “I like hanging out with you.”

 

“Me too,” Dean mumbled as he slowly drifted off to sleep.

 

* * *

 

When Seth’s eyes fluttered open, his vision blurred by sleep. A quick peek at the clock told Seth it was close to 9 AM. As he wiped the tiredness from his eyes, his vision cleared and he was met with Dean’s calm, sleeping face. Sometime in the night they must’ve turned over and ended up facing each other. Seth felt his breath catch in his throat as he watched Dean sleep. The way his unkempt hair fell over his face, the slow rise and fall of his chest, the way his lips parted just slightly. Seth got lost in all of it. His heartbeat picked up, his mind going through a thousand different scenarios. He instinctively reached his hand out, but drew it back. Scaring or creeping Dean out was the last thing he wanted to do. 

 

Not soon after Dean stirred awake with a groan. Seth had turned back over with his back facing him, feigning sleep. He grumbled and turned over onto his back, rubbing his eyes and stretching his limbs as much as his cramped bed would allow. He heard a loud  _ crack!  _ as Dean followed suit, his little groans and grumbles suddenly made Seth wish the bed was a little… roomier.

 

“G’mornin’,” Dean grunted. “What time is it?”

 

When Seth was finally able to focus on  _ anything _ else, he heard noises coming from the kitchen. “A little after nine. Sounds like mom is making breakfast. I’ll go let her know we’re awake.” Seth hopped out of bed.

 

“Just barely!” Dean grumbled as Seth shut the door. He heard Seth laugh just before it closed. 

* * *

 

“What do you mean you don’t have any real winter clothes? Aren’t you from Ohio?” Seth asked incredulously.

 

“I don’t know if you’re  _ aware _ , but I do a lot of acting before thinking. Besides, I had to pack light.”

 

“Alright smartass,” Seth said with a smirk, tossing onto his head a winter jacket and pants. Dean shook them off and picked them up to observe. “Keep them. I have extras.”

 

Dean slipped them on over his clothes, also finding a pair of gloves in the pockets. “You don’t have to give me these.”

 

“I want to. Someone has to make sure your wreckless ass stays warm. I’m sure you’re no stranger to winters like this.” Seth put on his own winter clothes and slipped a beanie over his head. Luckily, that was one of the few things Dean  _ did _ think to bring with him, so he put his on as well.

The snow had piled up at least a foot since it started the night before. Seth hoped it would look like this on Christmas day. Something about a white Christmas always made things so much better. After multiple snowball wars that would stand the test of time, Seth and Dean had taken to seeing who could build a snowman the quickest. As quickly as they had built them, they tackled each other’s down. Shouting and laughter only barely permeated the muffling quiet of the snow collecting around them. After stumbling back into the house, icicles formed on stray strands of hair and snow still dusting their clothes, they made big mugs of hot chocolate with plenty of marshmallows and hung their clothes up to dry. A blanket fort was suddenly the next on the agenda. It was turning out to be the perfect snow day.

 

* * *

 

“Do you text at all?” Seth asked. Dean turned over the phone in his hands absentmindedly. “Yeah, but I don’t like this thing that much. I just use it to keep in contact with mom.”

 

“We should exchange numbers!” Seth pulled out his phone. Dean sighed and opened his phone. “You’re not gonna text me a million times are you?”

 

Seth pursed his lips. “No, of course not. I just want to… have a way to contact you outside of you just showing up. That’s all.”

 

Dean grunted and handed him his phone. “Go ahead and add yourself. I barely know how to work this thing.”

 

After Seth added his name and number Dean very painfully, slowly, typed out a text so Seth had his number. A moment later, Seth’s phone went off. 

 

**(513) 809-6450** : nerd.

Dec 19, 4:10 pm

 

Seth smirked and shoved Dean playfully before adding him to his contacts and responding.

 

**Deano** : nerd.

Dec 19, 4:10 pm

 

**Seth** : How original lol.

   Dec 19. 4:11 pm

 

“Text me if you ever need anything, okay?” Seth said sheepishly.

 

“I can take care of myself. But... thanks.” Dean replied. “Wanna play more games? I swear I’m gonna get good at this and kick your ass.”

 

Seth grinned and grabbed the controllers. “Oh you are  _ so _ on!”

 

* * *

 

 

-1 week later-

 

That day lingered on Seth’s mind the entire week, excitement expanding in his chest every time he thought about how awesome it was. He wanted more days like that. It was Christmas morning and Seth was in his room, staring at his phone and debating on whether to text Dean or not. He hadn’t heard from him in a couple days and it started weighing on him. Dean didn’t have any family here, and he never talked about what he did or how he managed when he wasn’t at Seth’s house. He held onto the poorly wrapped present, Dean’s name on the Christmas-themed label his mom gave him. He heard his mom call him down to open presents. He decided to send Dean a text before running downstairs.

 

**Seth** : Merry Christmas!

Dec 25, 9:15 am

 

**Deano** : merry xmas

Dec 25, 3:50 pm

 

**Seth** : You wanna meet up later? I have something for you.

Dec 25, 4:00 pm

 

**Seth** : Dean? You okay?

Dec 25, 4:45 pm

 

**Seth** : Dean?? Text me when you can.

Dec 25, 5:17 pm

 

**Seth** : I’m getting worried… I’m going to go out and look for you.

Dec 25, 5:39 pm

 

Seth quickly put on his winter clothes, grabbed his phone, a flashlight, and pocketed the gift before stumbling out the door. He fumbled with his phone and turned on his flashlight as he ran down his street, sending his mom and dad a quick text to let them know he was going out for a walk. It was already dark as Seth ran down his street, shouting out Dean’s name. He slipped on the slick roads and his face nearly ate pavement as he searched in a panic for Dean. 

  
  


He kept his eyes open as he exited his neighborhood and made his way towards town. He checked the local stores, every alley in between, shouting out his name. Fear settled in, fear for the worst scenarios. That he had left like Seth had feared, or worse, that he was hurt and stranded somewhere. He searched the whole town, high and low with no sign of Dean anywhere.

 

_ Think Seth, think! Where would Dean go? It’s a small place… he couldn’t be far.  _

 

Suddenly like a bolt of lightning he remembered the diner. It was the only place he hadn’t checked yet. He could only hope that Dean was inside, enjoying a hot chocolate or coffee, and his phone was just dead. He practically crashed through the doors to the diner, his eyes scanning the booths and the employees who were giving him a worried look.

 

“Has anybody seen a guy around my age, sandy blonde hair, blue eyes, possibly in black winter clothes and a navy blue beanie?”

 

One of the waitresses spoke. “ Yeah I saw a kid like that standing outside like he was waiting for someone. But he walked off after about 10 minutes.”

 

“What time was that?” Seth was still heaving from running around town, he bent over to catch his breath. “It was close to 4 o’clock I think,” the waitress replied.

 

“Dammit!” He pushed the door open, determined to continue his search. “Thank you for your help.”

 

He looked around outside the diner and saw that there was a path to the back. It was a long shot, but something told him to look there. “Dean! Dean, where are you?!” He ran to the back of the diner and his heart sank. Dean lay slumped against the back wall looking disoriented but still conscious at least. Seth ran over to him, grabbing his shoulders and trying to get him to come to. He had a huge black eye, a busted lip and dried blood on his chin and on his forehead.

 

“Dean! Dean! Oh my god what happened? Please talk to me!” Seth cried out, tears streaming down his face. “God fuck, my head is killing me,” Dean slurred. “Damned bastard took my shit…”

 

“What are you talking about? Shit, forget that. You need help. We need to take you to a hospital or someth-” “No.  _ No  _ hospitals. ‘M fine, just need to walk it off.”

 

Seth scrambled to help Dean as he stood up, just barely catching him before he fell over. “Well if you wont go to a hospital let’s at least get you back to my place so you can warm up, okay?” 

 

Dean grunted but didn’t have the energy to protest, so he let Seth take him to the house. They were luckily able to sneak past his parents without them seeing. He helped Dean get out of his wet clothes, his boxers, which were luckily dry, stayed on.  He felt his cheeks warm up as he glanced at Dean’s body. He looked soft, but could see the slightly toned muscles that lie beneath. He shook his head, focusing on getting him warm. He gave Dean one of his old band t shirts and a pair of pants that didn’t fit him anymore and gently laid him on the bed, sitting him up and against a mountain of pillows. He put a couple blankets on him to gradually warm him up, remembering learning about how to treat potential hypothermia in school. He grabbed a first aid kit from the towel closet in the hallway and began dressing Dean’s wounds as best he could. “You can keep these clothes,” he said quietly. “I don’t wear these much anyway.”

 

“Dean… please tell me what happened. Were you mugged? What were doing at the diner?”

 

Dean winced as Seth applied antiseptic to his lip but stayed silent, avoiding eye contact. 

 

“You said some guy stole your stuff. You were so out of it. Did he beat you up? What for? That kind of shit doesn’t really happen around here…”

 

“What’s with the third degree huh? I didn’t come here to be interrogated.” Seth finished dressing his wounds and he sat back. “You were barely coherent enough to say  _ anything _ ! Why wont you talk to me? I’m just trying to help.”

 

“I didn’t  _ ask _ for your help,” Dean spat, his wounded pride coating his words like poison. 

 

Seth felt the sting of his words and bit back. “Well no one is stopping you from leaving if you don’t wanna be here.”

 

“ _ Fine _ ,” Dean hissed, tossing off the blankets and grabbing his phone from the side of the bed. Without another word, he climbed out his window and jumped down to the yard below. Seth sat in his bed in complete shock, his tears falling onto the present he held in his hands.

 

* * *

 

Dean gritted his teeth as he stomped out of Seth’s neighborhood, anger and pride fueling him. He cried out, slamming his fist into a nearby tree. “ _ God. Damn. It _ !”

 

He walked for a while, trying his best to cool off and think clearly. He took out his phone and for the first time he looked at Seth’s text messages after the incident. 

 

**_Seth_ ** _ : You wanna meet up later? I have something for you. _

_ Dec 25, 4:00 pm _

 

**_Seth_ ** _ : Dean? You okay? _

_ Dec 25, 4:45 pm _

 

**_Seth_ ** _ : Dean?? Text me when you can. _

_ Dec 25, 5:17 pm _

 

**_Seth_ ** _ : I’m getting worried… I’m going to go out and look for you. _

_ Dec 25, 5:39 pm _

 

He sighed, the anger slowly starting to fade away. He was scared. He was scared of how much Seth cared about him. He was afraid of how much  _ he _ was starting to care about Seth. Caring for people like that never ended well for him. He was afraid of what he tried to do tonight  _ because _ of how much he cared for Seth. Damn his pride. Damn it to hell. He turned back and ran towards Seth’s house.

 

* * *

 

Seth lied on his bed, his phone tucked in his hand as he stared at the ceiling. He went over the conversation in his head constantly, wondering what went wrong, what he could’ve said differently, if Dean would ever come back. All of it made him feel sick to his stomach with regret. He basically told Dean to leave, even when he knew he didn’t have anywhere else to go. What kind of friend was he? Suddenly his phone rang.

 

**Deano** : look outside your window.

Dec 25, 7:48 pm

 

Seth got up and pulled his curtains back to find Dean sitting outside on his roof, looking apologetic. Seth opened the window and let him in. Not knowing what to do with himself, Dean just stood there, his hands stuffed in his jacket pockets. Seth sat down, his fingers fiddling with his sweatpants. 

 

“Look-”

“I’m-”

 

They both stopped mid-sentence, Seth bit his lip. “Sorry, you go first.” 

 

Dean sighed. “I’m… sorry. I should’ve told you what happened before. I was just shaken up I guess.”

 

“It’s okay… I get it. I got worked up too. We both said things we regret,” Seth replied, feeling a weight being lifted from his shoulders.

 

“We cool?” Dean asked. “Yeah, we’re cool man,” Seth said as they knocked their fists together.

 

Dean sat down next to Seth, the palms of his hands digging into the bed as if he was bracing himself. “Here’s what happened…”

 

* * *

 

“ _ Drugs _ ? You’re dealing? Dean… that’s so dangerous. Why?”

 

Dean winced at Seth’s tone. “It’s a quick way to get cash. I had to do somethin’, I was almost out. Then that asshole…he beat me up and took everything except my cell phone. Luckily there wasn’t shit in my wallet except a little cash and my ID.” His shoulders slumped. “All he took from there was the money, but my backpack, my stuff in there, he took it all.”

 

“Shit… I’m so sorry,” Seth paused. “Let’s get it back.”

 

Dean turned to Seth. “For real?”

 

“Fuck yeah. I’ll help. We’ll teach that fucker a lesson and get your stuff back!” Seth reached under his blanket. “But until we make a plan, and we  _ will _ have a plan, here.”

 

He handed Dean the present. “I hope this makes things a little better. I hope you like it.”

 

Dean ripped the wrapping paper off to reveal a small box, he opened the top to reveal a silver chain necklace. It was simple, nothing fancy. He loved it. He looked to Seth, his mouth slightly open, surprised by the gesture. He put it on and hooked it around his neck.

 

“Dude. This is so cool. You didn’t have to get me nothin’.”

 

Seth smiled. “I thought you might like it. It suits you. Merry Christmas, Dean.”

 

Dean punched Seth’s shoulder playfully. “Merry Christmas, Seth.”


	4. Set in Motion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seth and Dean attempt to carry out their plan. A New Years Eve party leads to a daring progression in their friendship.

They had to work fast, spending the most of the day after Christmas coming up with a plan to get Dean’s stuff back. With the combo of Dean’s street smarts and Seth’s affinity for strategy, they quickly formulated a plan.

 

“Do you know anything about this guy? Where he hangs out? Who he hangs out with? Do you have a name?” Seth had a notebook out, already marked with notes and potential ideas.

 

“I’ve dealt to him once before. He goes by Ratchet. Don’t think he’s affiliated with any higher ranked guys, just an asshole looking to make a quick buck. He coulda roughed me up more if he wanted to since nobody was around, but he bolted pretty quick.” Dean watched as Seth made bullet points.

 

“Still can’t believe that loser robbed you on Christmas. He has no soul,” Seth huffed, writing ‘SCUM’ and ‘COWARD’ in scratchy bold letters.

 

“You’d be surprised what people will do,” Dean replied, his tone dark for a split second. “I’ve seen him loafing around the park recently. Usually only has one guy with him if any.”

 

“You remember what we do if there’s more guys than we can handle.” He gave Dean a stern look. “Yeah, yeah. We bail and try again later.”

 

“I can’t come home looking like I was in a full scale rumble alright? I can explain away bruises from wrestling to my parents but if I get too busted up they could really set back my plans.”

 

“I get it,” Dean replied. “I don’t wanna get you in trouble neither, but you won’t let me do this by myself.”

 

Seth finished writing his notes and clicked his pen dramatically. “You’re damn right I won’t. Sometimes you need backup, Dean.”

 

Dean grabbed the notebook from Seth and looked it over, trying to commit the plan to memory. In just about an hour, they’d go out there and teach that asshole that he messed with the wrong guy.

 

* * *

 

Dean found himself wringing his hands as they walked to the park. As they got closer he would clench and unclench his fists, spread his fingers out, crack his knuckles. He was laser focused, hellbent on retribution. Seth’s stomach was in knots, his heart rate spiking as they drew closer. Their plan was pretty solid and would only have to get messy if things didn’t go the way he hoped they would. He was as prepared as he was allowed to be. He attempted to calm himself down, break away from his nerves. They reached the bottom of the hill where the park was and from there they saw Ratchet and one of his friends. Seth scanned the environment and saw what he assumed was Dean’s backpack leaning against the bench they sat on. No twigs, no rocks, no natural weapons nearby. As long as they weren’t carrying anything it would be a fair fight if it came to that. He hoped Dean was right and these goons weren’t serious bad guys.

 

As they approached, the two guys stood up, likely recognizing Dean. Seth tried to keep his cool, keep his voice level. “We don’t want any trouble, guys. We just want back what’s his.”

 

Seth noticed Dean was still fidgeting, his shoulders tense, his fingers flexing. He put his arm around Dean’s shoulders to steady him and try to bring him back from whatever bad place he was going to. Seth could feel Dean simmer down much to his relief. It had to all go as planned.

 

“Faggots,” Ratchet muttered.

 

Seth winced at the harshness of the word, like a punch to the gut. Dean tensed up again and Seth could almost feel the burning anger flare up in his body. He gripped onto Dean’s shoulder, silently praying. _Please Dean just ignore him._

 

“What did you just say?” Dean hissed, a challenge.

 

“You heard me, _faggots_ ,” Ratchet spat. The other guy stepped forward, hands forming into fists. _Shit._

 

Like a wild animal, Dean lunged forward, tackling him to the ground and immediately throwing a flurry of punches. Seth jumped to action, giving the other guy a swift punch to the gut before slamming his knee into his face _hard_. The punk went down, clutching his face and heaving, trying to catch his breath. He turned and saw Dean continue to wail on Ratchet and his stomach turned. He ran over and pulled him off, Dean struggled against him, still seeing pure red.

 

“Dean! Dean, stop! He’s had enough alright? He’s had enough!” Finally, after seeing that neither of them were getting back up, Dean’s body went still.

 

Seth slowly let him go, still cautious. Seth could see his shoulders rise and fall rapidly as he huffed. Dean turned his head to look back at Seth. An inferno and a tundra. Somehow Dean was both. His face painted with flecks of blood, his ice blue eyes burning with white hot fury. The contrast between hot red and cold blue seemed almost unreal. Seth was enraptured and terrified.

 

The cloud of anger faded from Dean’s eyes and the tenseness of his muscles slowly faded. Dean walked slowly over to Ratchet and Seth followed, somehow sure that Dean was finished. His face was bloodied and bruised, welts already forming on his forehead and cheeks. It seemed he was unconscious. The other guy still lay on the ground, his face covered in blood from a broken nose. Dean reached down and pulled Ratchet’s wallet out of his pocket, thumbing through it and taking whatever cash was in it. He walked over to his backpack, unzipping and finding that all his magazines and clothes were still in there. He walked over to Ratchet one more time, putting his boot over his face.

 

“You _ever_ come near me or Seth again and I’ll make you wish you were dead,” He snarled.

 

He walked back to where Seth stood and wrapped his arm around Seth’s shoulder. “Let’s get out of here.”

 

* * *

 

Dean had been dead quiet on their walk back to Seth’s house. Dean’s anger was still fading, Seth could see it in the way he carried himself, the way his hand gripped Seth’s shoulder protectively. When they got into Seth’s room Dean sat on the edge of the bed, his shoulders hunched and his hands gripping his knees. Seth sat next to him, twiddling his fingers and working up the courage to speak.

 

Seth chewed his lip, pondering the question he had since the fight started. “What happened back there? You just kind of… snapped.”

 

“He called you...and me a word I don’t like. If that’s all he had to say after mugging me then he deserved to get punched and worse.” Seth thought back to how hateful Ratchet sounded when he spoke. The word still played in his head and made his stomach turn.

 

“I used to be stupid and say offensive shit like that too. Until I met someone who made me realize how harmful words like that can be. Now I don’t take kindly to people who say those words when they should know better.”

 

Seth looked down and noticed Dean’s hands, bruised and split at the knuckles. He didn’t hold back on any punch. “Here, let me bandage that up for you.”

 

Seth came back with bandages and medicine to clean him up. Dean held out his hands, clenching his teeth while Seth disinfected the cuts. Seth was very gentle and took his time, talking to Dean to keep him distracted while he tenderly wrapped his knuckles with gauze, making sure he was still able to move his hand properly.

 

There was a moment of silence after Seth finished, his hands lingering, still lightly holding onto Dean’s. He let them go in favor of leaning his head on Dean’s shoulder. “I’m glad you’re okay.”  


* * *

 

 

New Years Eve was finally here, and thus marking the end of Seth’s winter break. His friends had invited him to a party to celebrate and he had somehow convinced Dean to come with him. The prospect of free alcohol and food was enough of a convincing argument. When they reached the house they would hear loud music blasting and loud cheers. Dean didn’t plan on staying long, he wasn’t one for big parties. He was only here for Seth, who practically _begged_ him to come. He kind of wanted a chill night in with Seth, but free booze was good too. He didn’t have anything better to do anyway.

 

He watched as Seth greeted his school friends and one by one, he introduced him to everyone he knew. Once that was over with Dean gravitated to the table where all the alcohol sat. He grabbed himself a beer and watched Seth take his first shot of the night. It wouldn’t be his last.

 

“Deeeaaan,” Seth whined. “W-why’re you just standing there? The ball’s droppin’ in-in fifteen minutes we gotta see it.”

 

Dean couldn’t help but chuckle. “Why? It’s the same every year.”

 

Seth dramatically folded his arms and huffed. “Yer bein’ a spoilsport.”

 

“And _you’re_ very drunk. How many have you had?” Dean stumbled, almost dropping his beer when Seth suddenly leaned against him. “I had a lot.”

 

“I’m going outside for a smoke. Come with me, you could use some fresh air,” Dean draped Seth’s arm over his shoulder and held his waist for support.

 

They went outside onto the porch and sat on the steps. Dean pulled a cigarette out of his pack and lit it, taking a long well-deserved drag. Patches of iced over snow still covered the neighborhood. The cold night provided a comfort to Dean. There was no one to impress out here, no pressure, just the silent stillness of winter. Seth shivered and scooted closer to Dean to lean his head on his shoulder. Dean couldn’t help but smile, keeping himself steady to support Seth.

 

“I don’t have anyone to kiss when the ball drops,” Seth pouted.

 

“Sounds like a personal problem to me,” Dean teased, lightly jostling him.

 

“What...what if we…” Seth paused, then silence.

 

Dean’s heart skipped a beat, a nervous heat pooling in his chest. He didn’t move a muscle and neither did Seth. He still had his head resting on Dean’s shoulder, his growing nerves preventing him from making any movement. They both jumped when the countdown started, everyone in the house shouting. _10! 9! 8!_ Seth sat up slowly turning to face Dean. _7! 6! 5! 4!_ Dean followed suit, his eyes locking with Seth’s. _3! 2! 1!_

 

Dean made the move first, swooping in and pressing his lips to Seth’s. The rowdy cheering from inside seemed to muffle when their lips met. Seth was the one to pull back first, his eyes widened in surprise, his lips parted and cheeks tinted pink. They both stared at each other, chests heaving, in complete awe with what just happened. For a split second, Dean worried. What if he made a mistake? What if he read the situation wrong and Seth is freaking out right now?

 

Just as Dean was about to apologize, Seth fell into him, and their lips met again. This time more urgent, needy and exploratory. Seth tucked a hand under Dean’s jacket and around his lower back, pulling him closer. Dean’s hand slipped around Seth’s neck, gripping the collar of his shirt. When they pulled away again they were in a daze, heads swimming with adrenaline and desire. Their faces stayed close, each pressing their forehead against the other. Their eyes fluttered closed and then they were laughing, almost in disbelief. When their eyes opened again there was a comfortable silence, like a breath of relief.

 

“Happy New Year, Seth,” Dean said with a smile.

 “Happy New Year, Dean.”


	5. Don't Forget

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Seth's memories of New Years Eve blurred by alcohol, Dean starts to drift away to protect himself and Seth from getting hurt. Seth desperately tries to piece things together to figure out where it all went wrong.

“I must be dreaming,” Seth mumbled. He could hear Dean chuckle softly, his arm wrapped around his shoulder.

 

When they approached his house, neither of them let go of eachother. There was silence and reluctance, a little bit of nerves. Seth, alcohol still dictating the funneling of thoughts from his brain to his mouth, held Dean tightly.

 

“Don’t go. Please stay with me. It’s so cold... but it’s warm inside. We can be warm together inside.”

 

Dean couldn’t help but smile, his body still heavy from the beer, though his inhibitions stayed clear. He nodded and they quietly walked up to Seth’s room. While Seth attempted to remove his pants, Dean found two pairs of pajama bottoms for them to wear. Seth crawled into bed first, holding open the covers and smiling at Dean with half-lidded eyes. With the both of them so close, the mood shifted. An air of tension fell upon them and they were both, suddenly, _very_ nervous.

 

Seth slowly scooted closer and Dean could feel how fast his heart was beating. Their chests pressed against each other, Seth took refuge in the crook of Dean’s neck, his face nuzzling softly into his skin. Dean attempted to suppress a shudder, instinctively wrapping his arm around Seth. He felt Seth shift, his lips hovering over Dean’s ear.

 

“Can I...kiss you again?” Seth whispered. Dean could practically hear the embarrassment in his voice.

 

“Yeah...yeah, you can.”

 

He felt Seth’s lips meet his, way warmer than the first time, softer and less urgent. He leaned into it and heard a soft sigh, though he couldn’t tell if it had been him or Seth. The tenderness of the moment urged them further, everything around them melting together slowly. Dean took a shot in the dark and let his tongue run along Seth’s bottom lip. He heard Seth gasp and press himself closer, his tongue meeting with Dean’s and sending a spike of electricity through both their bodies. After what seemed like an eternity they parted for some air, both their chests heaving, their wide eyes locked on each other.

 

Dean came to a hard realization, he had to be the voice of reason, which was not something he was used to. Everything was happening really fast, and with alcohol possibly clouding their judgment, he had to reluctantly press pause on this. He sighed, brushing a stray strand of hair from Seth’s flushed face, and gave him a chaste kiss on his forehead.

 

“We should get some sleep. It’s been a crazy night,” he murmured.

 

Seth’s brow furrowed, his bottom lip jutted out in a pout. There was a long pause, but he knew Dean was right. “Yeah...it’s late isn’t it?”

 

Dean gave him a final tender kiss on the lips, lingering for a moment, his fingers brushing over Seth’s warm cheeks. “Goodnight.”

 

* * *

 

“Augh, my head is killing me,” Seth grumbled.

 

Dean could still feel Seth cradled against his back, his arm draped loosely over his waist. Dean shifted and heard Seth protest. He quickly shut up when Dean rolled over to face him, their faces inches apart.

 

“Someone has a hangover,” Dean teased, a playful smirk on his lips.

 

Seth shoved his face into the pillow and let out a muffled groan. He turned over and pressed his fingers to his temples, massaging them gently. “What _happened_ last night?”

 

Dean’s heart sunk, his gut burning with dread. Was Seth too drunk to remember last night? He cursed himself. This was what he was afraid of, thinking that he was taking advantage of him. Dean stayed silent, not sure if he should try to jog Seth’s memory.

 

“Everything’s so fuzzy.”

 

_Maybe he doesn’t_ want _to remember._ _Maybe you made yet another stupid mistake, just like you always do._

 

Dean stilled, trying to shove down the slowly simmering panic in his chest. Here he was, lying next to someone he really cared about, that he genuinely liked, and he doesn’t remember the moments they shared last night. He should’ve expected this, he should’ve been more prepared. He sighed, resigned himself to whatever fate had in store. At least Seth still wanted to be around Dean, that’s all he could ask for now.

 

“I haven’t met a hangover that a good greasy burger couldn’t fix. Let’s go to the diner, hm? We slept through the morning.”

 

* * *

 

“That was a killer headache,” Seth muttered, belly now full of greasy food.

 

Dean smiled and punched Seth’s shoulder playfully. “You drank a lot. I lost track of you really quick.”

 

“I feel way better now.”

 

There was a moment of silence in which Dean contemplated telling Seth what happened. But the fear in his gut made his parted lips close, the prepared breath he took in was exhaled. He thumbed at the chain necklace Seth gave him.

 

“Good. I’m glad.”

 

* * *

 

Weeks passed with Dean walking on eggshells around Seth, being overly cautious and reserved. Dean had reverted almost completely back to how he had acted in the beginning. Seth could sense something was wrong, but both were frozen in place, unable to bring it up in a way that seemed right. Seth felt like he was losing Dean, the hesitation cutting like a knife between them. Winter pressed on as January flew by, Dean was over less often after getting a new job. They texted every so often, and sometimes Dean would show up on weekends to hang out, but it wasn’t the same.

**Seth:** _Miss you… how’s the job going?_

February 2, 12:04 pm

 

**Deano:** _heh. it’s fine. work is work._

February 2, 12:20 pm

 

**Seth:** _Cool…_

February 2, 12:23 pm

 

**Deano:** _on my lunch break now. gonna murder this sandwich._

February 2, 12:30 pm

 

Seth couldn’t help but smile when he received a blurry picture of what he assumed was Dean’s lunch, already multiple huge bites had been taken out it.

 

**Deano:** _jon says if I can fix up the ol metal death trap in the shop he’ll let me have it. fuckin sweet right?_

February 2, 3:00 pm

 

**Seth:** _No kidding? That’s awesome._

February 2, 3:05 pm

 

* * *

 

When winter gave way to spring with little to no change, Seth became determined to figure out what went wrong. He thought back to moments that could’ve caused this but to no avail. It wasn’t until he went way back to the holidays that Seth started piecing things together. Christmas day, finding Dean beaten half conscious behind the diner. Dean dealing and getting mugged, going to fight those pricks and get back what he lost. Things were just fine then from what Seth remembered, aside from their fight that Christmas night. It was resolved quickly. So what _was_ _it_?

 

New Years Day! Was Dean acting weird then? They woke up together...sleeping in the same bed, but Seth hadn’t been nervous. He felt safe and comfortable. Did something happen the night before? He thought back to the party… he had gotten shit faced. He winced, he must’ve done something embarrassing. What if he’d said something weird? Something that scared Dean off? He thought _hard_ , going through every memory from that night. Everything was such a blur... _wait_ , they left the party didn’t they? Dean went outside for what...a smoke? The countdown...he remembered saying something right before the countdown and then what? Warmth...softness...excitement. He was happy that night because? Because...because…

 

Seth’s eyes widened. He remembered. He _remembered_. He scrambled to grab his phone. Dean was probably at work, he tended to work late hours. With Seth’s hands slightly shaking, wishing he’d remembered sooner, he sent Dean a text.

 

**Seth:** _Dean. We need to talk. Come over after work?_

May 8, 4:50 pm

 

**Deano:** _sure. i can be over in about an hour._

May 8, 5:30 pm

  



	6. Close the Distance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After recalling the memory of their kiss, Seth confronts Dean and aims to fix the tear in their relationship.

**Deano:** _be there soon._

May 8, 6:15 pm

 

Seth felt like he was going to throw up. His room felt too small, the air felt stuffy. He decided to get some fresh air and wait for Dean on his porch. His clammy hands gripped his jeans at the knees as he tried to steady his breathing. Just when he thought he was going to explode with anxiety he heard footsteps. He looked up and saw Dean walking up his driveway. The world around them seemed to still. Dean, covered in car grease and dirt. Dean, wearing that expression that Seth could never quite read.

 

“Hey."

 

“Hey.”

 

He sat down next to Seth, leaving a noticeable gap between them. “So, what did you wanna talk about?”

 

Seth took a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut and trying to remember everything he went through in his head. “I remember.”

 

_Well that didn’t come out like I wanted it to._ “Remember what?” Dean looked at him expectantly.

 

“New Years Eve! We...we kissed didn’t we? I got way too drunk. I woke up that morning and didn’t remember anything.” _0 to 60 in 1 second. Good job, idiot._

 

Finally, with the courage he’d been scraping for, he looked Dean in the eyes for the first time in a long time. He found a look of realization there, a flash of panic, and then nothing, like he had wiped it away. Dean ran his fingers through his hair and sighed.

 

“You knew? You knew this whole time and didn’t tell me?”

 

Dean was quiet still, his gaze fixed on his shoes. A million things went through Seth’s head in that moment.

 

“Look, I’m no good at this shit alright? I didn’t think-”

 

“Didn’t think what? Didn’t think I deserved to know? Didn’t think I would’ve wanted to?”

 

Dean’s body stiffened and after an agonizing moment he ripped his gaze from his shoes and looked at Seth. “I didn’t know _what_ you wanted! Hell, I didn’t even know what _I_ wanted! I didn’t think that night, I just acted. I thought you forgetting was a sign that I had once again fucked everything up.”

 

“So you were trying to protect me? From what?”

 

“From a mistake,” Dean muttered.

 

Seth could feel the coldness in Dean’s words, intentional and meant to keep him away. The walls were up and Seth was pounding his fists, desperately trying to break them down and understand what Dean was trying to hide.

 

“So you distanced yourself...do you know how much that hurt, Dean? How many nights I lied awake wondering if I had done something wrong?”

 

“I thought it would be better this way.”

 

“Well it isn’t! And I don’t think that kiss was a mistake! I…”

 

“Have you _really_ had time to think about this? You just remembered today.” The interruption seemed intentional and for a moment Seth wanted to grab Dean by the shoulders and shake him.

 

“Don’t patronize me,” Seth snapped.

 

Dean stayed quiet, not even giving Seth the courtesy of looking in his direction. Seth was so frustrated that he wanted to scream until tears blurred and burned at the corners of his eyes. For Dean, the silence that followed was for introspection; for Seth it served as a moment to build up courage.  

 

“I like you, you idiot,” Seth murmured.

 

“What?”

 

“I said I like you! I like you a lot. Like… as more than a friend okay? I have for a long time. Ever since that night we talked on my roof. You finally opened up and I felt like I got to see something special.”

 

He said it. He _finally_ said it and Dean was still quiet. Seth’s heart threatened to burst from his chest, but still he took a deep breath and looked at Dean. He thought he might collapse in on himself when he saw Dean smile. It was a small one, quivering slightly at the corners. It could mean anything. And when Dean took that first breath and parted his lips to speak, Seth felt like he was hanging onto a cliffside, on whatever words were to come from Dean’s mouth.

 

“I like you too, a lot. So much that I scared myself. I panicked when you couldn’t remember anything. So I did the only thing I knew how to, distance myself so neither of us got hurt.”

 

Seth closed that distance, grabbing Dean’s arm and pulling him into a tight embrace. Dean relaxed into it, wrapping his arms around Seth. “You don’t have to be afraid anymore okay? I’m here and I don’t wanna go anywhere. I won’t.”

 

Dean breathed a deep sigh, his fingers idly playing with the ends of Seth’s hair. Somehow Seth was almost certain that he had said just what Dean needed to hear. “Now, can I please kiss you again and _show you_ how much I mean it?”

 

Dean chuckled into Seth’s shoulder, making him shiver slightly. “You don’t gotta ask anymore, babe.”

 

Dean could see Seth’s cheeks and ears go red before he closed the distance between them with a deep kiss.

 

* * *

 

 

A week had passed since Seth and Dean started dating. They had both agreed to keep it a secret from family and friends for now to be safe. There was something so exciting about lightly holding hands under the table at the diner, or stealing kisses during walks in the neighborhood at night, when the street lights flickered on and the town went quiet.

 

“I think I wanna get a tattoo,” Seth said as they were walking back to his house.

 

Dean raised an eyebrow. “Really? That kinda surprises me. You never struck me as the ink type.”

 

“I drew something that I ended up liking enough to consider getting done. I’ll show you when we get back to my house!”

 

When they got back to Seth’s room he took out a leather bound journal, flipping to the most recent page. It was filled with various doodles with one being circled multiple times. It was a simple drawing of what looked like a torn piece of paper with the word “forever” written in cursive.

 

“I want it on my left wrist,” Seth said, his tone determined.

 

“It’s simple. Good for your first.”

 

Seth nodded, closing the journal and setting it on his nightstand. He lied on his bed, pulling Dean with him, their limbs tangled together. “Will you come with me to get it?”

Dean smiled and brushed Seth’s hair back, giving him a chaste kiss on the lips. “Yeah. I’ll even hold your hand,” he teased.

 

“Oh _ha ha_. Jerk.” but Seth was smiling still.     

 


	7. Birthday Ink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean has a surprise for Seth on his birthday.

 

**Deano:** _happy birthday, nerd. i got stuff planned for ya so i hope your evening is open_

_May 28, 11:05 am_

 

Seth’s heart fluttered, hugging the phone to his chest and kicking his legs against his bed. Almost unable to contain his excitement, he texted back.

 

**Seth:** _Thanks jerk. Got to stay home from school today! I think my mom and step dad are_

_taking me to dinner but I should have some free time after that._

_May 28, 11:15 am_

 

**Deano:** _cool. i wont be off work until 6 anyway. bring your journal and meet at my place?_

_May 28, 11:20 am_

 

**Seth:** _Sure. Why am I bringing my journal?_

_May 28, 11:20 am_

 

**Deano:** _no questions allowed_

_May 28, 11:30 am_

  


Seth’s heart skipped a beat. Dean had enthusiastically told Seth about his apartment as soon as he’d sealed the deal. They were both relieved to have Dean out of that sleazy motel and into a more stable place. Dean had written down his address and given it to Seth as soon as he could. The idea of having real alone time with Dean, without the threat of his parents walking in, made Seth’s pulse race. Seth’s imagination entertained him with many scenarios for the entirety of the day.

 

The rest of the afternoon went off without a hitch. His mom had made him his favorite for breakfast, cinnamon swirl pancakes with bacon and eggs. Dinner was set at a restaurant one town over. While Seth loved spending time with his family, he could barely contain his excitement for what lie ahead tonight. He wondered what Dean could possibly have planned for him.

 

* * *

 

Dean sighed, only barely audible over the sounds of heavy machinery and tools. He wiped the sweat off his brow, knowingly getting car grease smeared on his forehead. Today was the day this car would run. He’d been working on it for months in between repair jobs at the shop. Having his own car would make a huge difference. The places he could go, the places he could take Seth. He shook his head, trying to get rid of all the daydreams creeping up. With only the occasional glance at the clock, he continued his work.

 

* * *

 

**Deano:** _hey just got home. you comin?_

_May 28, 6:15 pm_

 

**Seth:** _Yeah I’ll be there in 10._

_May 28, 6:17 pm_

 

Seth took a deep breath as he walked up to Dean’s door, giving a quick _knock knock!_ before he lost his nerve. When he was met with tousled blonde hair and bright blue eyes magnified by patches of car grease he smiled, falling into Dean and feeling his arms wrap around him.

 

“Happy birthday,” Dean said, placing a kiss at the corner of Seth’s mouth.   

 

Seth just smiled, kissing him back as a ‘thank you’. After a quick tour of the humble but spacious basement he was renting Dean pulled Seth outside. “Check out what I got to take home today.”

 

A 1985 black Chevy Camaro sat in a parking space outside Dean’s building. Seth turned to Dean, his eyebrows raised. “Woah! This is _yours_ now??”

 

“She’s still a little banged up. Could use a paint job and new rims, but she’s up and running,” Dean replied, his voice oozing with pride. “C’mon. We’re going for a little ride.”

 

* * *

  


“Close your eyes,” Dean said around 20 minutes into the drive.

 

Seth didn’t venture out of town very often and genuinely had no idea where they were. He complied, focusing on the wind whistling through the open window and the music coming from Dean’s radio. “We’re almost there, I don’t want you getting any hints. Don’t open your eyes until I say so.”

 

A few minutes later Seth felt the car putter to a stop, resisting the urge to open his eyes. He heard Dean get out of the car and the _pop!_ of the car door opening on his side. He felt Dean’s breath tickle his cheek as he stole a quick kiss before guiding him out of the car. “Alright, open ‘em up!”

 

Seth’s eyes fluttered open and were met with a tattoo parlor. His mouth fell open, his eyes widening in surprise. “What better way to commemorate your 17th birthday than with your first tattoo?” Dean grinned wide, a subtle challenge.

 

“Are you serious? Will they even let me? I’m not 18 and no way would my parents sign off on this.”

 

Dean waved a dismissive hand. “You think I didn’t plan for this? You already got an appointment. It’s all good.”

 

Seth was nervous walking in of course, but with Dean by his side he felt as easy as was possible when getting your first tattoo. He sat down at the artist’s chair, pulling out his journal and pointing to the design he’d chosen.

 

“Hey Seth, my name’s Andy. I know first times are nerve-wracking but it’s a very simple design. Shouldn’t take much time, sweetheart.” While preparing, she explained the entire process, clarifying where he wanted the tattoo and how big he wanted it to be. “You ready?”  


Seth nodded, turning to Dean who was sitting right next to him, a reassuring smile on his face. Seth’s right hand dangled over the edge of the arm rest and Dean took it into his, squeezing it gently. Andy caught the kind gesture out of the corner of her eye and smiled. She used a disposable razor to shave off any potential hair on Seth’s wrist before disinfecting the area.

 

“Now the gun is going to make a loud buzzing sound when I turn it on and start tattooing so don’t be alarmed.”

 

She turned the gun on and gently placed her hand on Seth’s arm to signal she was about to start. “Try to stay still please.”

 

Seth, with his eyes fixed on the needle and his free hand gripping Dean’s, took a deep breath.

 

* * *

  


“All done!” Andy exclaimed with a cheery smile.

 

Seth sighed in relief. Aside from the occasional wincing, he held it together better than he thought he would. _Not bad, Rollins. Not bad at all._

 

“Now you take good care of this while it’s healing, alright? Keep it wrapped in this bandage for the first hour before doing anything else. Here,” she handed Seth a small bag. “There’s a bottle of healing ointment and unscented soap in there plus detailed instructions on how to keep it clean. It’s on me. You two are just the cutest,” she winked. “You make sure he keeps it clean and properly cared for over the next 2-4 weeks okay?” Andy pointed to Dean.

 

“You got it. Thanks for everything, Andy. But there’s one more thing I wanna do before we leave,” Dean turned, eyeing the piercing station behind him.

 

* * *

 

“I can’t believe you got your ear pierced!” Seth said as they hopped back into the Camaro.

 

Dean admired his left ear in the visor mirror with a smirk. “I figured I would get something to remember this day too. Not bad eh?”

 

“Makes you look tougher,” Seth snickered. “Tough guy with your Camaro and earring. Can’t believe my boyfriend is a bad boy.”

 

“Like you didn’t already know that from the start,” Dean replied, tapping his fist to Seth’s shoulder.

 

The chime of Seth’s phone ringing interrupted their conversation. “Shit, that’s probably my mom.”

 

“Yeah? I’m still hanging out with Dean... I know... Can I stay out for another hour at least? ...Please? Okay... Yeah, okay... Thank you mom... Love you too. Bye.”

 

“What’s the deal?”

 

“Gotta be home by 10 at the latest,” Seth glanced down at the bandage over his wrist. “You think they’ll notice?”

 

“I think you’ll be fine as long as you’re extra careful,” Dean reached his hand over to rest reassuringly on Seth’s leg. “Wanna hang out at my place for a little? We got about 2 hours before you have to get back home.”

 

Seth could feel a nervous heat pooling in his stomach, his mind racing again. “Yeah sure!”

 

* * *

  


“Make yourself comfortable,” Dean gestured to the futon in the living room, making his way to the small kitchenette area. Seth sat on the couch, unsure of what to do with his hands. “You want something to drink? I got soda and water. Also got some chips if you’re hungry.”

 

“I-I’ll just have a water, thanks.”

 

Dean came back with a glass of water for Seth and a can of Coke for himself. He sat down next to Seth, but left a little space in between them just in case. Dean flipped on the small TV he had in the living room and flipped through some channels before settling on some ghost hunting show. Seth scooted closer to Dean, leaning his head on Dean’s shoulder as he wrapped his arm around him.

“What? Are you scared?” Dean teased, giving Seth’s shoulder a gentle squeeze.

 

Seth’s ears turned red. “Hell no,” He muttered, nuzzling into the crook of Dean’s neck.

 

It wasn’t long before the boys got a little distracted from the TV. The silly stolen kisses they had been giving to each other throughout the show had gotten a little more heated, resulting in Dean straddling Seth on the futon, their lips locked. Dean tasted sweet, and Seth’s heart was racing, his hands slipping underneath Dean’s shirt and pawing at his back as Dean trailed wet kisses along his neck. Seth shuddered, a small whimper escaping his lips. It took everything Seth had not to grind against Dean, feeling the… obvious excitement between them. Dean pulled away for a moment, his bright eyes half-lidded, his lips cherry red and wet. Seth looked up at him, his own dark eyes curious, his lips parted as his chest rose and fell. The first instance of Dean showing any ounce of vulnerability was something Seth wanted to remember.

 

Suddenly Seth’s phone rang. “Shit.” He glanced at the time on his phone. 9:45. “Hello? Yeah mom I’ll be home soon… Dean is giving me a ride… Okay… okay I’ll see you soon.” He hung up, his lower lip jutted out in a pout. “I have to go home now.”

 

They both sat up, smoothing out the wrinkles in their clothes and adjusting themselves. “Alright, let’s get you home.”

 

* * *

 

Aside from the music playing, the ride was relatively silent, though their hands stayed weaved together the entire time. As Dean pulled up to Seth’s house there was an air of melancholy that fell over them in the car. Dean smiled, taking a quick scan of the neighborhood before pulling Seth in for a tender kiss.

 

“I had an awesome time,” Seth said. “Thank you again.”

 

“Don’t mention it,” Dean replied. “I’ll talk to ya tomorrow after you get out of school.”

 

Seth nodded, grabbing his backpack and heading up the porch. Dean lingered there until Seth had gotten inside before driving off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. This might be my longest bit between chapters ever. Sorry for the wait! Hope y'all like this one!


End file.
